Happy Xmas

select array_to_string(array_agg(chr(a[s])),'') "I wish you" from (
  select a, generate_series(1,array_length(foo.a,1)) s from (
    select array[72,97,112,112,121,32,88,109,97,115,33] as a
  ) foo
) bar;



Many thanks to all the people who developed and are developing PostgreSQL!

writeable CTE - a short performance test

Inspired by the talk from David Fetter and Mirko Tiikkaja performed on the PGDAY 2009 in Paris about writeable CTE i want to analyse a special aspect: minimizing I/O-operations with query clustering.

The talk shows an example that contains 7 tables: one person-table, 3 tables for details for a person (street, im and phone), which contains contact-data for the person, and 3 additional tables to map each person to multiple streets, im and phone.

Assumed, there are 2 entries for street, im and phone for a person, this results in 1 insert into the person-table, respectively 2 inserts into street, im and phone. In addition it needs 2 inserts for every joining-table.


With the new feature 'writeable CTE', the effort is reduced to single, (but complex) SQL-command, which contains - among others - all inserts. Of course, this procedure is complex.

In the following posting i want to analyse, if this single, complex command is faster than many simple traditional commands.

For this purpose i wrote 2 plpgsql-functions, which generate proper SQL-commands, one for the old style with many inserts
and one for the new syntax, both functions with exactly the same amount of data for the inserts.


Here are the two functions:

create or replace function fill_tables(IN c int, OUT sql text) returns text as $$
declare
  c_im int;
  c_phone int;
  c_street int;
  count int;
begin
  c_im:= 1 + strpos(md5(c::text),'a');
  c_phone := 1 + strpos(md5(c::text),'b');
  c_street := 1 + strpos(md5(c::text),'c');

  sql := E'INSERT INTO person (first_name, last_name, birthdate) VALUES (\'' ||
         md5(c::text) || E'\', \'' ||
         md5((c+1)::text) || E'\', \'' ||
         ('1970-01-01'::date + ('0' || regexp_replace(substring(md5((c)::text),0,8),'[^0-9]','','g'))::int * '1 minute'::interval)::date || E'\');\n';

  for count in 0 .. c_im loop
    sql := sql ||
           E'INSERT INTO im (provider, handle) VALUES (\'' ||
           md5((c+count)::text) || E'\',\'' || md5((c+count)::text) || E'\');\n';
    sql := sql ||
           E'INSERT INTO person_im(person_id, im_id) VALUES (' ||
           E'currval(\'person_id_seq\'),currval(\'im_id_seq\'));\n';
  end loop;

  for count in 0 .. c_phone loop
    sql := sql ||
           E'INSERT INTO phone (country_code, phone_number, extension) VALUES (\'' ||
           md5((c+count)::text) || E'\',\'' || md5((c+count)::text) || E'\',\'' || md5((c+count)::text) || E'\');\n';

    sql := sql ||
           E'INSERT INTO person_phone(person_id, phone_id) VALUES (' ||
           E'currval(\'person_id_seq\'),currval(\'phone_id_seq\'));\n';
  end loop;

  for count in 0 .. c_street loop
    sql = sql ||
          E'INSERT INTO street (street1,city,state,country,post_code) VALUES (\'' ||
          md5((c+count)::text) || E'\',\'' ||
          md5((c+count)::text) || E'\',\'' ||
          md5((c+count)::text) || E'\',\'' ||
          md5((c+count)::text) || E'\',\'' ||
          md5((c+count)::text) || E'\');\n';
    sql := sql ||
          E'INSERT INTO person_street(person_id, street_id) VALUES (' ||
          E'currval(\'person_id_seq\'),currval(\'street_id_seq\'));\n';
  end loop;
end;
$$ language plpgsql volatile;

And:

create or replace function fill_tables_new(IN c int, OUT sql text) returns text as $$
declare
  c_im int;
  c_phone int;
  c_street int;
  count int;
begin
  c_im:= 1 + strpos(md5(c::text),'a');
  c_phone := 1 + strpos(md5(c::text),'b');
  c_street := 1 + strpos(md5(c::text),'c');

  sql := E'WITH t_person AS (\n  ' ||
         E'INSERT INTO person (first_name, last_name, birthdate) VALUES (\n  \'' ||
         md5(c::text) || E'\', \'' ||
         md5((c+1)::text) || E'\', \'' ||
         ('1970-01-01'::date + ('0' || regexp_replace(substring(md5((c)::text),0,10),'[^0-9]','','g'))::int * '1 minute'::interval)::date || E'\') RETURNING id),\n

  sql := sql ||
         E't_im AS (INSERT INTO im (provider, handle) VALUES ';
  for count in 0 .. c_im loop
    sql := sql || E'\n  (\'' || md5((c+count)::text) || E'\',\'' || md5((c+count)::text) || E'\'),';
  end loop;
  sql := trim(sql,',');
  sql := sql || E' RETURNING id),\n';
  sql := sql || E't_person_im AS (INSERT INTO person_im SELECT * FROM t_person CROSS JOIN t_im),\n';

  sql := sql ||
         E't_phone AS (INSERT INTO phone (country_code, phone_number, extension) VALUES ';
  for count in 0 .. c_phone loop
    sql := sql || E'\n  (\'' || md5((c+count)::text) || E'\',\'' || md5((c+count)::text) || E'\',\'' || md5((c+count)::text) || E'\'),';
  end loop;
  sql := trim(sql,',');
  sql := sql || E' RETURNING id),\n';
  sql := sql || E't_person_phone AS (INSERT INTO person_phone SELECT * FROM t_person CROSS JOIN t_phone),\n';

  sql := sql ||
        E't_street AS (INSERT INTO street (street1, city, state, country, post_code) VALUES ';
  for count in 0 .. c_street loop
    sql := sql || E'\n  (\'' || md5((c+count)::text) || E'\',\'' ||
                                md5((c+count)::text) || E'\',\'' ||
                                md5((c+count)::text) || E'\',\'' ||
                                md5((c+count)::text) || E'\',\'' ||
                                md5((c+count)::text) || E'\'),';
  end loop;
  sql := trim(sql,',');
  sql := sql || E' RETURNING id),\n';
  sql := sql || E't_person_street AS (INSERT INTO person_street SELECT * FROM t_person CROSS JOIN t_street)\n';

  sql := sql || 'VALUES (true);';


end;
$$ language plpgsql volatile;

And here the output of this functions (for example, for one person):

INSERT INTO person (first_name, last_name, birthdate) VALUES ('c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b', 'c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c', '1970-01-04');
 INSERT INTO im (provider, handle) VALUES ('c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b','c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b');
 INSERT INTO person_im(person_id, im_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('im_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO im (provider, handle) VALUES ('c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c','c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c');
 INSERT INTO person_im(person_id, im_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('im_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO im (provider, handle) VALUES ('eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3','eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3');
 INSERT INTO person_im(person_id, im_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('im_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO im (provider, handle) VALUES ('a87ff679a2f3e71d9181a67b7542122c','a87ff679a2f3e71d9181a67b7542122c');
 INSERT INTO person_im(person_id, im_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('im_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO im (provider, handle) VALUES ('e4da3b7fbbce2345d7772b0674a318d5','e4da3b7fbbce2345d7772b0674a318d5');
 INSERT INTO person_im(person_id, im_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('im_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO im (provider, handle) VALUES ('1679091c5a880faf6fb5e6087eb1b2dc','1679091c5a880faf6fb5e6087eb1b2dc');
 INSERT INTO person_im(person_id, im_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('im_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO phone (country_code, phone_number, extension) VALUES ('c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b','c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b','c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b');
 INSERT INTO person_phone(person_id, phone_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('phone_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO phone (country_code, phone_number, extension) VALUES ('c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c','c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c','c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c');
 INSERT INTO person_phone(person_id, phone_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('phone_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO phone (country_code, phone_number, extension) VALUES ('eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3','eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3','eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3');
 INSERT INTO person_phone(person_id, phone_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('phone_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO phone (country_code, phone_number, extension) VALUES ('a87ff679a2f3e71d9181a67b7542122c','a87ff679a2f3e71d9181a67b7542122c','a87ff679a2f3e71d9181a67b7542122c');
 INSERT INTO person_phone(person_id, phone_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('phone_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO phone (country_code, phone_number, extension) VALUES ('e4da3b7fbbce2345d7772b0674a318d5','e4da3b7fbbce2345d7772b0674a318d5','e4da3b7fbbce2345d7772b0674a318d5');
 INSERT INTO person_phone(person_id, phone_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('phone_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO phone (country_code, phone_number, extension) VALUES ('1679091c5a880faf6fb5e6087eb1b2dc','1679091c5a880faf6fb5e6087eb1b2dc','1679091c5a880faf6fb5e6087eb1b2dc');
 INSERT INTO person_phone(person_id, phone_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('phone_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO phone (country_code, phone_number, extension) VALUES ('8f14e45fceea167a5a36dedd4bea2543','8f14e45fceea167a5a36dedd4bea2543','8f14e45fceea167a5a36dedd4bea2543');
 INSERT INTO person_phone(person_id, phone_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('phone_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO phone (country_code, phone_number, extension) VALUES ('c9f0f895fb98ab9159f51fd0297e236d','c9f0f895fb98ab9159f51fd0297e236d','c9f0f895fb98ab9159f51fd0297e236d');
 INSERT INTO person_phone(person_id, phone_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('phone_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO phone (country_code, phone_number, extension) VALUES ('45c48cce2e2d7fbdea1afc51c7c6ad26','45c48cce2e2d7fbdea1afc51c7c6ad26','45c48cce2e2d7fbdea1afc51c7c6ad26');
 INSERT INTO person_phone(person_id, phone_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('phone_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO phone (country_code, phone_number, extension) VALUES ('d3d9446802a44259755d38e6d163e820','d3d9446802a44259755d38e6d163e820','d3d9446802a44259755d38e6d163e820');
 INSERT INTO person_phone(person_id, phone_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('phone_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO phone (country_code, phone_number, extension) VALUES ('6512bd43d9caa6e02c990b0a82652dca','6512bd43d9caa6e02c990b0a82652dca','6512bd43d9caa6e02c990b0a82652dca');
 INSERT INTO person_phone(person_id, phone_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('phone_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO phone (country_code, phone_number, extension) VALUES ('c20ad4d76fe97759aa27a0c99bff6710','c20ad4d76fe97759aa27a0c99bff6710','c20ad4d76fe97759aa27a0c99bff6710');
 INSERT INTO person_phone(person_id, phone_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('phone_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO phone (country_code, phone_number, extension) VALUES ('c51ce410c124a10e0db5e4b97fc2af39','c51ce410c124a10e0db5e4b97fc2af39','c51ce410c124a10e0db5e4b97fc2af39');
 INSERT INTO person_phone(person_id, phone_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('phone_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO street (street1,city,state,country,post_code) VALUES ('c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b','c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b','c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b','c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b','c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b');
 INSERT INTO person_street(person_id, street_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('street_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO street (street1,city,state,country,post_code) VALUES ('c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c','c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c','c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c','c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c','c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c');
 INSERT INTO person_street(person_id, street_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('street_id_seq'));
 INSERT INTO street (street1,city,state,country,post_code) VALUES ('eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3','eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3','eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3','eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3','eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3');
 INSERT INTO person_street(person_id, street_id) VALUES (currval('person_id_seq'),currval('street_id_seq'));

And, with writeable CTE:

WITH t_person AS (
   INSERT INTO person (first_name, last_name, birthdate) VALUES (
   'c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b', 'c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c', '1970-01-31') RETURNING id),
 t_im AS (INSERT INTO im (provider, handle) VALUES
   ('c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b','c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b'),
   ('c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c','c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c'),
   ('eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3','eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3'),
   ('a87ff679a2f3e71d9181a67b7542122c','a87ff679a2f3e71d9181a67b7542122c'),
   ('e4da3b7fbbce2345d7772b0674a318d5','e4da3b7fbbce2345d7772b0674a318d5'),
   ('1679091c5a880faf6fb5e6087eb1b2dc','1679091c5a880faf6fb5e6087eb1b2dc') RETURNING id),
 t_person_im AS (INSERT INTO person_im SELECT * FROM t_person CROSS JOIN t_im),
 t_phone AS (INSERT INTO phone (country_code, phone_number, extension) VALUES
   ('c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b','c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b','c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b'),
   ('c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c','c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c','c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c'),
   ('eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3','eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3','eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3'),
   ('a87ff679a2f3e71d9181a67b7542122c','a87ff679a2f3e71d9181a67b7542122c','a87ff679a2f3e71d9181a67b7542122c'),
   ('e4da3b7fbbce2345d7772b0674a318d5','e4da3b7fbbce2345d7772b0674a318d5','e4da3b7fbbce2345d7772b0674a318d5'),
   ('1679091c5a880faf6fb5e6087eb1b2dc','1679091c5a880faf6fb5e6087eb1b2dc','1679091c5a880faf6fb5e6087eb1b2dc'),
   ('8f14e45fceea167a5a36dedd4bea2543','8f14e45fceea167a5a36dedd4bea2543','8f14e45fceea167a5a36dedd4bea2543'),
   ('c9f0f895fb98ab9159f51fd0297e236d','c9f0f895fb98ab9159f51fd0297e236d','c9f0f895fb98ab9159f51fd0297e236d'),
   ('45c48cce2e2d7fbdea1afc51c7c6ad26','45c48cce2e2d7fbdea1afc51c7c6ad26','45c48cce2e2d7fbdea1afc51c7c6ad26'),
   ('d3d9446802a44259755d38e6d163e820','d3d9446802a44259755d38e6d163e820','d3d9446802a44259755d38e6d163e820'),
   ('6512bd43d9caa6e02c990b0a82652dca','6512bd43d9caa6e02c990b0a82652dca','6512bd43d9caa6e02c990b0a82652dca'),
   ('c20ad4d76fe97759aa27a0c99bff6710','c20ad4d76fe97759aa27a0c99bff6710','c20ad4d76fe97759aa27a0c99bff6710'),
   ('c51ce410c124a10e0db5e4b97fc2af39','c51ce410c124a10e0db5e4b97fc2af39','c51ce410c124a10e0db5e4b97fc2af39') RETURNING id),
 t_person_phone AS (INSERT INTO person_phone SELECT * FROM t_person CROSS JOIN t_phone),
 t_street AS (INSERT INTO street (street1, city, state, country, post_code) VALUES
   ('c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b','c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b','c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b','c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b','c4ca4238a0b923820dcc509a6f75849b'),
   ('c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c','c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c','c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c','c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c','c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c'),
   ('eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3','eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3','eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3','eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3','eccbc87e4b5ce2fe28308fd9f2a7baf3') RETURNING id),
 t_person_street AS (INSERT INTO person_street SELECT * FROM t_person CROSS JOIN t_street)
 VALUES (true);

First i created 2 sql-files with the output of my functions, each contains 10.000 rows for persons, in total for all tables 727104 rows.




kretschmer@tux:~/cte$ psql -X -t test -c "select fill_tables(s) from generate_series(1,10000) s;" > data_old.sql
kretschmer@tux:~/cte$ psql -X -t test -c "select fill_tables_new(s) from generate_series(1,10000) s;" > data_new.sql
kretschmer@tux:~/cte$ ls -l data*
-rw-r--r-- 1 kretschmer kretschmer  51113563 Nov 13 18:43 data_new.sql
-rw-r--r-- 1 kretschmer kretschmer 102391561 Nov 13 18:43 data_old.sql
The file with the new syntax is just half the size.
Okay, lets rock'n'roll, my 8.5devel is listening on port 5434, i'm using the default configuration on a quadcore with 4
GByte RAM, the operating system is Ubuntu.

I'm executing the files with the following command(s):


time /usr/local/pgsql/bin/psql -X -p 5434 -h localhost test -f data_old.sql

real    9m2.466s
user    0m10.789s
sys     0m11.357s
time /usr/local/pgsql/bin/psql -X -p 5434 -h localhost test -f data_new.sql

real    0m34.294s
user    0m1.620s
sys     0m0.528s
Very impressive, isn't it?
(i know, i could optimize both versions with prepared statements etc.)
I hope, the upcoming 8.5 will contain this feature.

This feature has a small disadvantage: it's not portable, since no other RDBMS knows about writable CTE!


Many thanks to all the people who developed and are developing PostgreSQL!

Mit Freunden in Paris

Wir, also meine Frau sowie Katharina und Tamara, verbrachten einige Tage in Paris.

Zum einen, um den PGDay Europe 2009 zu besuchen, zum anderen, um mit Freunden Paris zu erkunden.

Zu sehen sind hier Andreas, Andrea, David Fetter, meine Frau, ich sowie die Kinder Pascal und Tamara, Katharina machte das Bild.

Leider war die Zeit deutlich zu kurz, um all die vielen tollen Dinge in Paris zu erkunden. Es reichte aber für den Louvre, den Eiffelturm, eine Fahrt auf der Saine, Notre Dame.

Nun ja, was bleibt sind die Erinnerungen an schöne Tage, an denen ich viele mir bis dahin nur via eMail & IRC bekannte Leute mal kennenlernte und mehrere hundert Bilder, die darauf warten, aufbereitet zu werden.

Not only David: see you in Amsterdam (maybe Brussels) next year!

Andreas

alternating sort order

I know, i'm lazy, i haven't written new blog-entries for a long, long time.


Someone ask in the german Postgresql-Forum: how can i sort in alternating order?

Okay, after some hours i found this solution:

Image, you have this table:

test=*# select * from foo;
i                      
----                    
1                     
2                     
3                     
4                     
5
6
7
8
9
10
(10 rows)

And now my solution:

test=# with
f1 as (
  select i, row_number() over (order by i)::float as nr from foo limit (select count(*) from foo)/2),
f2 as (
  select i, row_number() over()::float+0.5 from (
    select i from foo offset (select count(*) from foo)/2)x
)
select * from f1  union select * from f2  order by nr;
i  | nr
----+-----
1 |   1
6 | 1.5
2 |   2
7 | 2.5
3 |   3
8 | 3.5
4 |   4
9 | 4.5
5 |   5
10 | 5.5
(10 rows)

The first subquery returns the first half of the table with a new numbering column, starting
with 1 increment by 1.
The second returns the other half. Because the row_number() - function would start with the
offset, i have moved the row_number() function out of this subquery and created a other subquery around, to start my row_number with 1. After that, i added 0.5 to this (of course, i have to cast the int to a float to do that)

Yeah, now i'm able to sort in alternating order.

And yes, sorry about my bad english...

waiting for 8.4

I'm a PostgreSQL-User and today i have tested a new and cool feature in the upcoming new release 8.4:

CTE, aka Common Table Expressions. It allows recursive queries.


Imagine, you store your pedigree in a table:

test=# select * from pedigree ;
id |         name         | father | mother
----+----------------------+--------+--------
1 | Guenter Kretschmer   |        |
2 | Christa Kretschmer   |        |
3 | Andreas Kretschmer   |      1 |      2
4 | Anja Kretschmer      |        |
5 | Magdalena Kretschmer |      3 |      4
6 | Katharina Kretschmer |      3 |      4
7 | Tamara Kretschmer    |      3 |      4
(7 rows)

Now you want to see all children, for instance from my father:

with recursive children as (
  select p.*, 1 as level
    from pedigree p where name='Guenter Kretschmer'
  union all
    select p.*, c.level+1
    from pedigree p
      join children c on (c.id=p.father)
) select
  c.name,
  c.level,
  coalesce(father.name,'--unknown--') as father,
  coalesce(mother.name,'--unknown--') as mother
    from children c
      left join pedigree as father on (c.father=father.id)
      left join pedigree as mother on (c.mother=mother.id);


name                  | level | father             |       mother
----------------------+-------+--------------------+--------------------
Guenter Kretschmer    |     1 | --unknown--        | --unknown--
Andreas Kretschmer    |     2 | Guenter Kretschmer | Christa Kretschmer
Magdalena Kretschmer  |     3 | Andreas Kretschmer | Anja Kretschmer
Katharina Kretschmer  |     3 | Andreas Kretschmer | Anja Kretschmer
Tamara Kretschmer     |     3 | Andreas Kretschmer | Anja Kretschmer
(5 rows)

Or you want to see the parents:

with recursive parents as (
select p.*, 1 as level
   from pedigree p where name='Tamara Kretschmer'
union all
select
   p.*,
  parents.level+1
from pedigree p, parents
where p.id=parents.father or p.id=parents.mother
) select
parents.id,
parents.name,
father.name as father,
mother.name as mother
from
 parents
 left join pedigree father on parents.father=father.id
 left join pedigree mother on parents.mother=mother.id;

id  | name               | father             |       mother
----+--------------------+--------------------+--------------------
7   | Tamara Kretschmer  | Andreas Kretschmer | Anja Kretschmer
3   | Andreas Kretschmer | Guenter Kretschmer | Christa Kretschmer
4   | Anja Kretschmer    |                    |
1   | Guenter Kretschmer |                    |
2   | Christa Kretschmer |                    |
(5 rows)

Ende der Sägerei?

So, gestern war es soweit: die OP, die gegen das Schnarchen helfen soll, fand statt.

Zur Erinnerung: entgegen der Meinung des durchführenden Arztes stritten sich 2 Krankenkassen, darum, wer wieviel der Kosten übernehmen darf. Den Zuschlag erhielt dann meine bisherige Kasse, sie trumpfte das Angebot einer anderen Kasse gnadenlos aus.

Also betrat ich gestern mutig die Praxis, begleitet von meiner Frau und Tamara. Es ging dann auch schnell zur Sache.

Zuerst einmal eine LMAA-Spritze in den Arm. Harmlos.
Unmittelbar darauf 6 Betäubungsspritzen in den Rachen. Das war heftig, nicht wegens Schmerz, sondern weil in einem Bereich, der normalerweise rexflexartig etwas auslöst, was ich hier nicht weiter bildlich erklären möchte.

Dann durfte ich ca. 10 Minuten lang mich an dem Gefühl erfreuen, daß man Rachen langsam zuschwoll.

Dann kam die eigentliche Behandlung: die Nadel, die da zum Einsatz kam, erinnerte an eine Stricknadel von Oma: vielleicht 1mm dick (an der Spitze) mit langem Kabel daran, welches an ein angeblich 15 KiloEURO teures Gerät ging. Dieses erzeugt Radiofrequenzen in der Spitze der Nadel, welches dann zur Erhitzung des Gewebes führt, in der die Nadel grad halt steckt. Quasi eine Mikrowelle.

Es wurden 4 Stiche gemacht, jeweils beim rausziehen kam dann 2 Mal für je ca. 1-2 Sekunden die Mikrowelle zum Einsatz, mit Leistungen von 13 Watt. Das war wegens der Betäubung nicht wirklich schmerzhaft, das Geräusch erinnerte aber an ein Steak, welches in der Pfanne bruzelt.


In Summe bekommt man also für ca. 625 EUR eine Menge geboten. Die Wirkung, daß ich also nicht mehr schnarche, wird sich aber erst in ca. 6 Wochen einstellen: so lange braucht der Körper, das gegarte Gewebe zu entsorgen.



Andreas

über ein Stöckchen gestolpert...

ads warf mir ein Stöckchen zu (hier)

Nun, okay.

1. Wenn Du eine beliebige Person sein könntest, für wen würdest Du Dich entscheiden?

Kurz dachte ich: irgend so ein Mega-Arschloch. Also Bush, Stasi 2.0 aka Schäuble oder sowas. Und dann noch so viel Ehre haben und zurücktreten. Aber das Problem wäre, ich hätte dann 3 Kinder, die sich für ihren Papa schämen müßten. Und ungeschehen kann man deren Scheiße auch nicht machen. Also auch keine Lösung.

2. Welchen Kinofolm hättest Du am liebsten nie gesehen?

Schwer zu sagen, eigentlich keinen. Naja, vielleicht welche, wo ich mit den Kindern war und die mich selbst nicht so interessierten.

3. Welches Getränk wärst du?

Ein leckeres GUINNESS ?



So, wem werf ich das nun zu? Miracee fällt mir ein, und Schabi. Aber wer mag, kann es ja aufheben...


Andreas